Junky Trunks, And Bumpy Humps

Consider this Number 8 in my list of blessings.

Curves.

It is a popular word these days with the ladies. Apparently the PC thing is to agree with any lady who thinks she has curves. Even if they don't, or only have one. Not I agree that no human it built in straight lines, but some of them....I mean men are more "curvy" than some of them! And I am sorry, but 50 pounds of weight that largely resides in one area (waist, belly) is not a "curvy" figure. 

This is not intended to be mean. It is intended to be honest. I think we sugar coat and butt kiss too often these days. The next thing you know all men's dongs will be considered "huge". And tall, and handsome. And everyone will be smart, and athletic, and can sing and dance and we are all just perfect and good at everything. Oh, I guess next we should all just be one race, religion, and all that.

I think being different is great. Even if it is sometimes by less popular standards. I have one arm, everyone remembers me, since grade school, because of that. I love having an uncommon name. Though, in recent years, it is less uncommon. I love anything that sets me apart from others. 

SO I WANNA TALK ABOUT CURVES! REAL CURVES! 

The kind that shows up in numbers, measurements, pictures! The kind that fills out jeans and fill up bras!

Look, everybody has bad things, normal things, good things, funny things, normal things, craptastic things, and fantabulous things, etc... All stitched together into one unique and awesome person! So instead of pretending we all have the same goods and bads, how about we get excited and celebrate our differences! How about you let curvy girls enjoy being curvy, and thin girls enjoy being thin, and accept that they are not both the exact same!

What is positive about being a curvy gal? Well, one plus is when you gain weight, it goes into some pretty fantastic places. Cake goes to your butt before your gut. You gain 20 lbs, but it spreads itself out to boobs, booty and thighs. An apple gains weight, it goes right to the waist. And often, only there. And anybody could look the same (good in fashion) when thin, underweight, or super low body fat. Anybody can rock a well toned body. How many people can look sexy with 20 lbs of extra weight on them? 

Yes, we are all aware thin is in. We are all aware fit is fab. But is it so bad if curvy is complimented? Separately? We don't call every girl fit or thin just to make them feel better. In fact, people can be kinda rigid with those standards. Now we are all aware TOO MUCH WEIGHT is unhealthy (news flash: so is being too thin). We are ALL AWARE that too much fat is NOT ATTRACTIVE (again, underweight is not either) So lets just cross out the extremes from this list. Not that anyone should be mean to either of them, but we are just leaving them out of this discussion as extremes are just too bad for people's health. 

Now lets celebrate junky trunks and bumpy humps!

I AM GLAD!!!!
I am glad that I gots boobs.
I am glad that I gots booty.
I am glad that when I gain weight, it goes to my curves and not my gut.
I am glad that, because of that, I don't get "rolls".
I am glad that I have stuff to squeeze and parts that please.
I am glad to be a curvy girl!

I think the media should show all types of (healthy, non extreme) bodies of ladies as models, in mags, and ads, fashion shows, and all popular forms of media and entertainment.

But that is it for this blog. This girl loves being curvy, it is one of the positive things on my list. Long torso is both bad and good, short calves is kinda bad. So, see, isnt it WAY WAY better to just be honest about ourselves? I think so! Otherwise, I guess I should not openly admit that I have one arm, I should say I have two. "We all have two arms!" 

So ya. BOOBIES!

LOLOLOL

Count Your Blessings - Part 1

As I am turning 33 this year, I think, I figured it might be a nice change of pace to do a blessings blog. One with 33 blessings counted. It is a good practice to remember the things in life, both big and small, that make us happy. And be thankful.

I will break this up into 5 segments. That not only gives me time to collect an image for each thing, but more time is able to be spent on each part.

it is my goal to have it finished before my 33rd birthday December 29th this year. I hope that those who read my blog enjoy.

33 Lani Blessings 

1. Husband 

I am thankful to have a wonderful husband. A best friend whose arms could never hold me enough. And then whose hugs can heal all pain, and whose smile can brighten my day. He bring so much laughter and love to my life. I cannot imagine life without him. I love waking up to him and his kisses. I live going to sleep in his arms. I love being with him....anywhere anytime. 

2. Family 

where would we be without the love and support of our family? I am thankful for the blessing of a good family. So no body and no life is perfect, I believe that we can still love each other through imperfections. I believe sometimes a little bit of struggle and a few imperfections makes us the interesting characters that we become in this story of many lives sewn together in one world. A world full of wonderful characters.I believe that family helps to make us who we are. And family is not always blood, for some of us how grown up without any blood relatives but still know the meaning of family. Family are the people who become permanent fixtures in your life.

3. Pets / Fur Family

Every since I I was a wee child... I have had such love 4 the furry people. And then on for people to I suppose. Whether they be mammals, birds, reptiles whatever. They make my life complete. I cannot imagine life without them. And I do not at all want their share in my life too be considered trivial. My animal friends are very important to me! I cannot imagine being happy without them.

4. Yummy

there are people in this world who have never experienced food the way Americans have. Who have never experienced food away many people have in other countries as well. There people in this world who struggle to eat anything at all. Who are starving and when they are not starving are eating whatever they can get even if it is less then pleasing. These people do not know food the way that some of us get to. It is not but a struggle for them. Even in the countries who no food in excess, there are still those who dig in the garbage starving for food. So I do not want to forget the blessing that it can be. Not just in its basic purpose of nourishing, but in the delight that I have been blessed to experience it in my whole life. I am blessed to have a family where almost every member can cook, and cook well.

5. Holidays 

Again, there are those in the world who are less fortunate and do not get to experience holidays the way we do. There are countries in the world that do not have as many holidays as we do. And there are places that probably even been holidays type celebrations. There people so poor that it is the furthest thing from their mind. Although even these people usually find a way to celebrate life. Which may be the most beautiful sentiment of all. That even and desolate poverty humans will still find a way to celebrate life. That is just beautiful to me, that is why I love holidays. They are a reason to celebrate life with those you love.

6. Beauty

I believe it is important for us, no matter what the popular opinion or media frenzy, to find ourselves beautiful. As the individual that we are. Being alive, breathing, are unique character, how we interact with others, life and the world around us in general. We should find beauty and as many things as we can. In action as well as ideas. On the surface and past it. Every season is lovely to someone...every color to be favored or faulty in the eyes of individuals. so that is where the beauty lies, and the unique as individuality of mankind. As well in the world that we live. The world around us is full of unique and changing beauty. So let us appreciate a beauty that is uncommon, or unique. Let us not all just mindlessly follow whatever someone has expressed to be the current trend. But actually put thought and what we believe is beautiful.



7. Chocolate

I know I already mentioned yummy food... But I believe chocolate deserves a whole section by itself. I have probably got the deepest love affair with chocolate over any other food. It does make me happy, and the amount of it I am allowed to have is a blessing. Not to be taken lightly! I feel I should count this blessing out loud, scream it from the rooftops, because of a potential developing situation. It is possible that sometime in the future chocolate will be more expensive and not quite as common. And although I am unsure if that is a theory, rumor, or direction we are already heading, I feel as though I should vow my love for chocolate publicly now despite. Chocolate I love you! you make my life complete :-) and a big thanks to my husband for putting up with my chocolate have it the way he does. I can put away a lot of chocolate! I prefer it and its dark and pure form. Not that I don't enjoy baked goods, ice cream, candy, etc... But, just chocolate by itself is good for me! Which is another good point I should make, chocolate is good for you! They used to believe it was a junk food. White chocolate, and milk chocolate kind of still are. But dark chocolate is actually very beneficial. Even if it wasn't, I would still love it.

Agent Dog Get

I am currently mostly just a stay at home fur mother and homemaker. It is TERRIBLY boring though. I started selling Mary Kay, thinking it would be a nice break from being at home all of the time. However, I am NOT the kind of person that can beat people upside the head with sales pitches. So I am NOT making as much money as some of those above me.

I tried to think about what I would be good at, what kind of job I could get that I think I could keep? What kind of boss could I have that I would not get in a tiff with? I am a very social person, I liked being around people and being out in the world. It gets really boring being shut inside the house all the time.

I thought occurred to me. Anytime I am out in public where there are animals I gravitate to them almost more than humans. I have a tendency to not even hear what the person is saying or to know where the parties I was once accompanying have disappeared to as my full attentions  go towards wanting to interact with the animal.

And I also know of myself a few other fitting facts. I can handle walking for quite some time. And since I was a child my mother and sisters have referred to me as Ellie Mae Clampett. I seem to get along with animals fairly well. Though I do not pretend to be any kind of Cesar Millan type person. I do think I have away with them.

Then upon realizing what my new dream was, I decided to start looking up salaries. I discovered that a certified dog walker, perhaps even some on certified funds, can make up to almost $20 an hour her dog for a 20 to 30 minute walk. The certification is not cheap. Almost $400 for a three year certification if you do not join and become a member. Becoming a member is $150 a year on average. I think I would rather just pay for the three-year certification and not the added membership. Unless I learned that the added membership has some kind of serious benefits.

in case you have not figured it out by now... I am referring to a dog walking / pet sitter job. I could be my own boss. Advertise on websites like care.com, eventually get certified, and make my own website. I would not need a boss, or have to worry about what hours they force on me or what holidays they will let me have. Sick days might be tricky to navigate as well a few other things. But all in all it sounds grand.

There is currently one major thing holding me back. I have a car, one that would work decently for a job such as this. However, anyone that knows me is aware that I do not drive. It is my goal to take the written test before the year's end. I seem to do OK on practice tests, apps on my cell phone, so I plan on trying to take a written exam next Wednesday after my doctors appointment. If time allows. I would like to take the test before December is over. And then I can work my way up to taking the actual driving course exam thing. For those of you who are not aware that I do not drive you might wonder why? Well I was born with half of my left arm, and every time I have been behind the wheel of a car I feel like I do not have very good control over it. It makes me panic a little and scares me from trying to learn. But the older I get, turning 33 this year I believe, the more I realize I cannot just walk everywhere. I do not live in Atlanta or any major city where that is an acceptable option. I live in the suburbs. And for this job to happen I will need to learn to drive.

But that is my new goal... Pet sitting.

Process

1. Take written driving test
2. Learn to drive
3. Get license
4. Build up pet sitting jobs
5. Get certified
6. Make website
7. Happy

Of coarse... Until I am finished learning to drive there is no reason I might not offer these services to my neighbors. I can always have my cost lower until I am able 2 get certified.