Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Truth Serum! 50 Truths

Okay let us let a few cats out of their bags! Let us pretend I have drank a truth serum, and am outing myself on some of my secrets. Secrets are not as fun if you do not tell them to people. 


50 Lani Truths:

1. Hubby has to remind me to brush my teeth before bed. 

2. If I run out of chocolate, I turn into a fiend and take it from other peoples stashes.

3. Though I hate onions with a passion, I sometimes still add them to dishes for flavor

4. If I am feeling sick (pukey) I will make myself throw up to alleviate it.

5. I do not shave everyday. Or even every other. 

5. I do not actually wash my hair that often. With curly hair over washing results in dry fluffy frizziness. I wash maybe 2 times a week. 

6. I can be snobby.

7. On that note, I do judge people. 

8. I am currently using "plum" eyeliner as a brow pencil. It looks brown, and I do not wish to pay the cost of a real brow pencil when I have the plum for free. (can you tell?)



9. I can not stand some of the (original) voices to un-dubbed anime. They are irritating.

10. I "re-wear" pj pants and jeans a few times, if clean, before washing.

11. I just about refuse to iron. I hate it! I always use the dryer to get out wrinkles.

12. I will dry a load several times over to stall putting it up.



13. I wash and dry "dry clean only" 

14. (last laundry one i swear) I rarely separate colors. Its only two people the loads would be so tiny! I just wash and dry everything on "delicate". 

15. If i am in trouble with my hubby, I will shamelessly through someone else under the bus to get his anger off me. (i know, terrible) Then, once I am sure he has moved past being mad at me, I "fix" what i caused.

16. I am actually a great but very subtle manipulator. 

17. On that note, my hubby thinks I am unaware of his more obvious attempts at manipulating me. I just play along. 

18. I want sex almost everyday around 11am. 

19. Since getting Mirena, I have had a higher libido. 



20. My first real orgasm ever was with my current husband. I never realized what "type" I was. (Explanation: gyno gal on "the doctors" said there are two types of girls. One with magic spot inside vagina, one with magic spot onside around clit) Apparently I am the second type, but if i stimulate both at once it is so strong i want to literally cry and scream. TMI?

21. I like and value animals above most people and almost all children. 

22. I think rather lowly of people who use the F word. 

23. My opinion on most average republicans is pretty ....well, not great.

24. I put (a decent bit, it takes a couple layers) makeup over my scars on my chest (see below image)





25. On that not, I will "Photoshop" some of my pics. One of the reasons? my keliods on my chest (scars)

26. I like and hate taking group pictures. (like because its like "look I am having fun with friends and actually have a life" but hate because I am actually NOT that photogenic. Only I can get decent pics of myself like with selfies but it still takes multiples to do which is not always an option for group pics)



27. I do not really like the way most pictures of me smiling look. I get what I call "Fred Flintstones" which are the marks or folds, whatever, from your cheeks to your nose when you smile. It draws attention to my nose, which I hate. So most pics I do not smile in. 

28. Men scare me. Any man, any age (over 21) any creed, any race, that I do not know (and some I do) is a threat to me. 

29. Dispite having scars. I like wearing low cut shirts! Mostly, for me.

30. Good truth. I dont stink much. Really. My gas, which i do not often have, rarely ever has a smell or sound, and I do not really sweat much (why I overheat so easy) and even the little I do doesnt stink. I am not sure why some peoples sweat smells and others do not. 

31. I am kinda scared about losing my medicaid and being off my crazy pills

32. I worry about whether or not I could EVER sustain a job long enough with my bipolar issues. 

33. I am considered a "tax break" for jobs due to being "handicapped" and it does not bother me. 

34. I rarely dust stuff above my head. I forget that area exists.


35. Even when I admire what others have a rarely get jealous over anything. But I enjoy playing "jealous" over my hubby (he has a ton of girls flirt with him all the time and call him their present or man or boyfriend). Not to say it is impossible. I can get pretty flutered every now and then when I do get jealous over him. But he is one of very few things I get jealous over. I do not if girls are prettier, or if someone has more money, or better stuff, or a fun life. But it can happen. it is just rare.

36. I am not a very good gamer.

37. I only learned to spell better from texting and autocorrect.

38. I am one of those smartphone addicted people. Seriously. 

39. I do not have tons of friends right now. I actually have become more introverted and less people tolerant in my older years. I love saying hi to strangers and complimenting them and making them smile... but i prefer they stay strangers. Friends can be a lot of work. My hubby takes up so much of my life right now. I just have not got a big need for huge groups of friends.

40. I am not sure that I actually know some of the people on my Facebook. 

41. I finally gave in a few weeks ago and joined SNAPCHAT. I wanted more people to Snapchat with and put my sn up on Instagram. That was a mistake. I got tons of guys from ages 18 to 35 adding me and hitting on me or sending me shirtless pics! I took it off Instagram after that. And had to block and unfollow people.


 42. I do NOT like to tell people my mistakes. Lets be honest, I make them too often. I usually just do what I can to fix or hide them and move on silently. 

43. In case you were unaware, I have one arm. Missing half left. If I could magically grow an arm tomorrow I am not sure I would want to. Because then I would be like everyone else.

44. I have only one issue with having one arm. I cant do my hair.

45. I am very territorial over my name. I do NOT like other people having it.

46. Most Elena's I see are prettier and more successful than me. I am not a very high ranking Elena.

47. I am completely okay with failing or sucking.

48. I have never thought I was ugly or stupid. No matter what happens to me. No matter what people say. I kinda do not value others opinions enough. (well, not over my own anyway) and have been that way just about forever. Even as a kid. 


49. I am a mid level "conspiracy theorist". I think most people are sheep, but I also think a lot of Cons. Theo.'s are nut jobs or gullible. 

50. I refuse to "re-wear" undies or socks. But I will bras. If my undies come off my feet, that is it. They are done. Even if only worn 5 mins. And socks? Once they come off, even after a few minutes, they are done. But bras, as long as not sweat in, I will wear over and over. 




Okay. I think that is enough TELL ALL for now. 
Have a good day!

Friday, March 11, 2016

Returning To The Working World

So a short blog to update my situation.

I had a friend that needed help with cleaning houses. I do that at home anyway so I offered my services.  Well, aside from occasional dog sitting and my attempt at selling Mary Kay I have been out of the working world for quite some time. But I have to say it has been nice working. And since it is a friend, she can work around my disabilities and understands me. Plus, I don't drive. She picks me up and we carpool to the locations. It just works! And I feel better about myself knowing I am helping and also just getting out in the world not always being stuck at the house. It was my hubbys idea honestly and it was a good one. I am sure God had his hand in this. Because it fits so well. I feel blessed.

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Our Destiny

Have you ever heard of the popular new game Destiny? In the game, humans have almost gone extinct. But that is not the part that I wish to discuss. We have, in the game, began civilizations on other planets in our solar system. It reminds me of Firefly, how humans had spread out to other planets.



I think, well hope, it is our "destiny" to start life on new worlds as well. Whether they be close by or far off. I think it is a good idea.

Well, it is as long as those new places are built with the long-term goal of a utopia. Not the mess we have on earth. Though I do hope one day we will fix a lot of the issues we have on earth.

Let's discuss that. After all, great expansive civilizations start on the home world. Right?

What do I think earth needs to work on to remedy our many current problems? Well, one that is obvious is to go as green as possible. We don't need to take a abusive and polluting mindset to other worlds. That way is honestly selfish and that mindset is just not healthy for developing a utopia. It contradicts.  I think when we really see a drive, collectively, to heal our world and go green then it will be a hint that we are moving in the right direction to an overall better society.

Next I think we need a one world government. I know, the bible (maybe others) warn about that day. But I am not refering to one that kills Christians or persecutes groups of beliefs or opinions. I mean one large harmonious, green, tolerant, peaceful, non-violent goverment. One that has a better life and advancement and evolution of our species in mind. I think it would be on the list of things we need to accomplish before we venture outwards. We need to perfect our own society, then start looking to build new.



The next one goes along with that last one I guess. We need to abolish violence. This begins by people excepting people who are different and focusing on each other as all living breathing intelligent beings who can all work better hand in hand towards a common goal.

Another would be technology. Science and technology. We need to really put less focus and money and effort on wars. Instead, why not use all the time, energy, and resources to bettering our understanding of the world(s) around us. Plus, to venture into the dark abyss and mystery of space, we really should put money and time into advancing our technology. And not just new TV's and hoverboards. But, things that will take us towards our goals and dreams. Big stuff. Research and create better space traveling vehicles. Maybe try to solve the mysteries of worm holes or warp speed.

Now, why should we explore space and create new civilizations on other planets? Well, one good reason is, if a meteor hits the earth and kills off everyone we will go extinct. Completely erased from existence. If we spread out and create thriving societies in New worlds we stand a better chance of being around still a million years in the future. It just makes sense.



But I am sure other people have other really good reasons. One might be to learn about the universe, or to travel to new places, or to seek out life in the universe. Maybe we do it just to continue to advance. There are many more reasons and ideas I am sure.

Just something to think about. A goal. Something we could become if we all move into the right direction. Our decisions need to reflect that goal. Every one of them. Think about what you do in life, does it help?

Saturday, February 13, 2016

My Cheesecake Recipe

I just typed it out, thought I would share the recipe that has made me famous with my loved ones. It was definitely a lot of trial and error. But errors were still yummy. I started with a recipe from AllRecipes.com called "Chantal's New York Style Cheesecake" .
It is a good recipe of you want to try it. I have since changed things up and it has resulted in this recipe.
*I recommend using a LARGE food processor in lieu of a stand mixer. I read a baking book I got from Sur La Table that suggested it. Saying stand mixers whip air into food.  Which for a smooth dense cheesecake is bad. Food processors do not, however.

Thursday, February 4, 2016

Keloid Scars

So as I sit here at the Dr office waiting on my cortisol injections to my many keloid scars I thought I might do a quick blog about them.

Keloids are an overreaction your body has when healing an injury. An over production of collagen I believe. Mine personally come from body acne. So I am on meds to prevent acne so it lessens my chance of getting new ones. But they can come from various things.

Anyone, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, etc. Anyone can get them. However, Dr said it's MORE common in blacks.

The injections Dr's give are to flatten them and lighten them. Lessening the itching is a bonus. HOWEVER IT IS IMPORTANT THAT YOU KNOW THAT THESE INJECTIONS HURT SUPER BAD! Your injecting a hard mass. That hurts more than most pains I have ever felt.

They can numb them first though. With a topical cream. I am about to test how helpful the numbing treatment will be. Fingers crossed it helps a good bit!!!!

Some Dr will have other methods to help also. I would suggest you inquire to these before scheduling your appt to get injected.

They can not cut them out. Because your body will produce a larger one. Its your body not healing certain areas correctly.

You get them various places but commonly they are on back and chest. I have heard ears, arms, face and stomach too.

That is all for now. I will update at bottom after I get mine done.

Monday, August 31, 2015

Trans-Dimensional Beings Revisited


We Live in a world consisting of three dimensions. Those are the dimensions that we know and are part of. Humans we have a tendency to take  for granted that this is all there is to the universe. Just like we assume we are the only living things here in earth because we have not found other creatures elsewhere in the universe. We have a tendency we think that we know everything. Not sure why that is. The only thing we know is that we know nothing.


I do believe there is more. Much more. I believe our universe is like an onion. I do not know how many dimensions there are but I do believe that there are more than three. Some scientists have Theorized anywhere from 5 to 11 dimensions. I myself would air on the side of 11 I guess. If not more. There's really no way to tell as we cannot travel to them or through them.



  So if there are multiple dimensions then surely there are multiple creatures that can move through them. What would such creatures be like? We have a tendency to assume also that if there was such creatures that they would be like us because apparently we are the greatest thing ever made. So how could anything be different than us and be great? I think if something is able to transcend dimensions it is likely not that similar to us although it may be able to take on the appearance of us.


We are solid flesh and blood creatures made up of matter. That is what these three dimensions of our universe are about. Mostly time and matter. I think the best thing something could be made out of to transcend multiple dimensions including ours would be energy. Just Energy. If such a creature was out there that was only made up of energy surely it could take on different shapes as needed. Who knows there could be creatures that are inter dimensional and solid that can still take on different shapes even though it doesn't make sense to us. That's the thing we don't seem to understand I think is that it doesn't have to make sense to us to be true. Just because we don't know it yet doesn't mean it's not real and doesn't exist. The truth isn't only the truth simply because humans know it.













Monday, August 3, 2015

Lucky

This post will likely be short. I just had a thought on my brain and I figured why not share it on my blog. I haven't been blogging as much recently. I guess for a while now. But I had a thought that seemed important. I feel it is important.

I am lucky.

There are many versions of that sentence, many definitions, many details, many ways that statement is true. But the one I'm specifically talking about, the one that came to my brain and is flooding it with emotions currently is my future.

I am lucky that my bad past has not badly affected my future. I am lucky that I get to be happy despite all of the really stupid decisions that I made. I am lucky to be loved so much by my husband despite the fact that he was good in his past and I was wild. I feel blessed to be loved by someone like him. Sometimes, you kind of feel like you don't deserve it. But I do everything I can everyday to feel more like I deserve His love. Spoil him rotten.

I just feel so lucky that all of my bad decisions, years wasted making bad decisions, have not darkened my future. Or my present. Lucky to have this life lucky to have his love. Lucky to be forgiven by Jesus for all my sins. Lucky to have a family like I have. Not only the one I've always had but the 1 I gained through my husband. When it gets down to it... I have a pretty good life now.:-)

Thank you god.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Parsley To Start Your Period

Parsley To Start Your Period



This will be a relatively short post as I just want to get straight to the point. Parsley is an herb used in many foods and sometimes as garnish. You can easily buy it at most grocery stores. It is rich in so many vitamins and nutrients, and is loaded with benefits! 

One of which is "PERIOD STARTER"!

From my various attempt I learned what actually works. Drinking teas... not for me. But as a pessary yes! However, there are some details. First, it best to use fresh, not dried. Second, I prefer Italian leaf over the other. I feel it is stronger. Now some people wrap it in cheese cloth, I did not. I know it's something in the herb that, when contact with your skin, causes you to contract. I found, thirdly, that it must be left in for 12 hours. I tried 6, changing it out each time with no success. But the moment I did 12, Bam. Period!

So that is that. Some have suggested using organic (pesticide free). And trimming the stems. Do what is best for you!

As with anything ...take caution. Anything we do has the potential to somehow become harmful to us. So always be aware of that fact. 

Monday, February 16, 2015

Let people be who they are

People like to size up a person by the way that they look or act. For example, I have even seen TV shows mention this, a person who is disabled in some way is immediately considered a good person. Disabled people do not do things wrong they think. I can tell you that's a lie. All my teachers in school learned that.
Sure, some people decide to stick to the stereotypes. It's their prerogative. But never assume that any person, no matter what they look or sound like, is any 1 specific way.
Take me for example. People who don't know me very well would see somebody who was relatively white has one arm and lives in the suburbs. They would probably assume that I do not know very much about life, that I am Republican, and a very nice person. And they would be wrong. I am a mixture of almost all races, I am only missing half an arm it does not affect me being good or bad, and though I live in the suburbs I have also been on the streets before 2. I know how that goes. Also I am NOT Republican or Democrat. Personally I hate the government and thank people are stupid for fighting on one side of the other instead of against the government completely. Team red team blue ...both suck.
Point is you don't know a person from a min or two of sizing them up. Well ...most do not. I have met people who are capable of doing that pretty well. But it is a very rare gift that most people do not have. Although I am sure more people think they have it then actually do. Trust me when I say most people are not capable of doing that. So it is best to assume that you do not know that person and give them the chance to be the person who they really are.
Let them tell you who they are.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Junky Trunks, And Bumpy Humps

Consider this Number 8 in my list of blessings.



Curves.

It is a popular word these days with the ladies. Apparently the PC thing is to agree with any lady who thinks she has curves. Even if they don't, or only have one. Not I agree that no human it built in straight lines, but some of them....I mean men are more "curvy" than some of them! And I am sorry, but 50 pounds of weight that largely resides in one area (waist, belly) is not a "curvy" figure. 


This is not intended to be mean. It is intended to be honest. I think we sugar coat and butt kiss too often these days. The next thing you know all men's dongs will be considered "huge". And tall, and handsome. And everyone will be smart, and athletic, and can sing and dance and we are all just perfect and good at everything. Oh, I guess next we should all just be one race, religion, and all that.




I think being different is great. Even if it is sometimes by less popular standards. I have one arm, everyone remembers me, since grade school, because of that. I love having an uncommon name. Though, in recent years, it is less uncommon. I love anything that sets me apart from others. 

SO I WANNA TALK ABOUT CURVES! REAL CURVES! 
The kind that shows up in numbers, measurements, pictures! The kind that fills out jeans and fill up bras!


Look, everybody has bad things, normal things, good things, funny things, normal things, craptastic things, and fantabulous things, etc... All stitched together into one unique and awesome person! So instead of pretending we all have the same goods and bads, how about we get excited and celebrate our differences! How about you let curvy girls enjoy being curvy, and thin girls enjoy being thin, and accept that they are not both the exact same!


What is positive about being a curvy gal? Well, one plus is when you gain weight, it goes into some pretty fantastic places. Cake goes to your butt before your gut. You gain 20 lbs, but it spreads itself out to boobs, booty and thighs. An apple gains weight, it goes right to the waist. And often, only there. And anybody could look the same (good in fashion) when thin, underweight, or super low body fat. Anybody can rock a well toned body. How many people can look sexy with 20 lbs of extra weight on them? 


Yes, we are all aware thin is in. We are all aware fit is fab. But is it so bad if curvy is complimented? Separately? We don't call every girl fit or thin just to make them feel better. In fact, people can be kinda rigid with those standards. Now we are all aware TOO MUCH WEIGHT is unhealthy (news flash: so is being too thin). We are ALL AWARE that too much fat is NOT ATTRACTIVE (again, underweight is not either) So lets just cross out the extremes from this list. Not that anyone should be mean to either of them, but we are just leaving them out of this discussion as extremes are just too bad for people's health. 







Now lets celebrate junky trunks and bumpy humps!





I AM GLAD!!!!
I am glad that I gots boobs.
I am glad that I gots booty.
I am glad that when I gain weight, it goes to my curves and not my gut.
I am glad that, because of that, I don't get "rolls".
I am glad that I have stuff to squeeze and parts that please.
I am glad to be a curvy girl!











I think the media should show all types of (healthy, non extreme) bodies of ladies as models, in mags, and ads, fashion shows, and all popular forms of media and entertainment.

But that is it for this blog. This girl loves being curvy, it is one of the positive things on my list. Long torso is both bad and good, short calves is kinda bad. So, see, isnt it WAY WAY better to just be honest about ourselves? I think so! Otherwise, I guess I should not openly admit that I have one arm, I should say I have two. "We all have two arms!" 


So ya. BOOBIES!


LOLOLOL